Work Life Balance

Hello flower friend,

In case you think I’m playing with seeds and plants all day, here’s a real picture of how ahem, integrated my family life and seed starting shelf are. Starting a business, even a part time one, out of a full and vibrantly alive (aka cluttered) home is always going to be messy, and I’m trying to keep my time and supplies as distinct as possible. The legos do have a way of not listening to my plans and migrating toward my seed shelf…. 

It’s sometimes hard for me to turn off my flower brain and turn on my mom brain. I get carried away with plans and schedules and I want to be working in my thoughts when it’s kid time. I’ve been out of the work force for four years and it’s as if my starving intellectual side is taking a long, needed drink. While this isn’t a bad thing by itself, my family needs my focus too. I don’t just mean feeding the kids and dressing them–that’s easy to do while focused on my own distractions, as I know too well. What’s really, really hard is stopping my own mental chatter and fully listening while my preschooler is telling me about his theories on the wheels of construction vehicles. Not living in my own distractions has always been a challenge for me. I’m imaginative, future oriented, and love making plans. And after you experience a big loss, you develop this mindset that the future may not be guaranteed, so making changes feels of the greatest urgency. The present feels too quiet, too uncomfortable. I get squirmy. But kids, whether we like it or not, pull us, sometimes with great force, to “be here now.”

I know that a present oriented mindset is immensely helpful for healthier relationships and personal mental health. It’s just really hard to put into practice, and I often don’t want to try. However, I’m always surprised by how simply being mentally present with my kids makes me enjoy the life I have more. They actually might be pretty awesome little people. In reaching for the “if onlys,” the distractions, the future, I’m looking for satisfaction that never comes. Like those little woven finger traps, the more you pull away, the more stuck you get. Relaxing into what we have, into what is here right in front of my stubborn nose, even if it’s not perfect, will set me free. Here’s hoping I stop squirming enough to give it a try. 

Until next time! 

Meredith

Winter 2025